Goals, Expectations and Appreciation
As you wrap up 2020 and look ahead, are you starting to think about your goals and expectations for 2021?
Years ago, I realized that I had expectations in my life that were bringing deep feelings of frustration and disappointment within me. Those expectations became a ball and chain around me. I kept thinking I should be further along in my life, further along in my career and coaching business. So, even though I had some goals and plans, I was letting disappointments and frustrations based on my expectations get in the way … things were not working out the way I thought they would or should. So, in my case, expectations were working against me by me.
Expectation is defined as a “strong belief that something will happen or be the case in the future.” I have heard it said that expectations are like looking into the future and trying to predict something you don’t know if it will or will not happen. Perhaps you expected your career to be further down the road because you graduated with a certain degree. When you said “I do” you expected to be married a long time. However, it did not end up that way. So, when life doesn’t happen like we planned or expected, we become disappointed.
When you trade your expectations into appreciation, you take the stress and frustrations off yourself. Tony Robbins (see quote above) further states when you start thinking with a view from appreciation….you won’t be disappointed when things don’t turn out the way you thought. Appreciation becomes a gateway for you to lean into gratitude. When we start appreciating things as they are and appreciating the things we have, we will have an attitude of gratitude. So, should we have expectations? If we choose to have expectations, then we need to keep them very flexible and fluid to allow change to flow in and out of them (like the year 2020).
What does Tony’s quote mean to you?
How can you apply a view from appreciation into your life and make it a part of 2021?
BHAG - Have you heard of the phrase “big hairy audacious goals?” Many corporations apply this to their corporate goals. You can, too. A BHAG stretches and guides you as you push ahead to accomplish your goals. Goals can be defined as “mark out the boundary or limits.” Goals are identified as possible outcomes with a process defined to help us reach them.
Goals will help you line the path with markers to get to your desired result. Goals must be fluid just like expectations because change is always happening around us. You may still reach your result, but the steps or path may look different than what you planned. And, that is okay! What happens if you don’t meet those BHAG? Tim Ferriss, creator of The 4-Hour Workweek, states “When you reach for high goals, you can’t be depressed when you only make it halfway… for this is often farther than you would have made it if you had set your sights lower to begin with.”
Can goals slide into expectations? If you are not flexible with your goals and don’t allow change, as needed, then you can slide into those expectations and disappointment will follow.
Tim Ferriss says, “I view fulfillment as a combination of achievement and appreciation.”
So today, let’s decide to reach for the prize and let gratitude and appreciation be our lens.
“The ultimate reason for setting goals is to entice you to become the person it takes to achieve them.” Jim Rohn
