When Life Takes a Turn
“We must be willing to let go of the life we planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us.” – Joseph Campbell
What Happened With My Life?
Have you ever heard yourself say, “My life has not turned out the way I thought it would?” You accepted a new job offer, but after a few months, you feel this is not a fit. You married the love of your life and years down the road you find yourself facing divorce. You have raised your kids but now you are surprised at some of their decisions? The list goes on and on. I have been there many times over the years. I find if I stay in the mindset and emotions of “this is my life,” I will miss the good that is already around me. Years ago a counselor gave me a new way to think when I felt let down by life moments. He had me focus on “What if I am exactly where I need to be?” There are times our expectations are unrealistic because we cannot predict the future of how life will play out around us because it is constantly changing. However, you can still move in the direction of your passion. You can still ask yourself “What more do I want out of my life?” Do you see more relationships, career opportunities, adventures, or different life experiences ahead of you? Today you may or may not be on that path, but are you okay with it? Life changes, people change … change is constant!
Here are a few ways to re-think your current life status:
✅Ask yourself why you feel this way. Don’t make it about right or wrong. Maybe it is time to re-evaluate. Hit the pause button and reflect.
✅Talk to a good friend or mentor and get a fresh perspective. They may see something you don’t and provide you with some advice you have not thought about or they can be the encourager you need right now.
✅It’s okay. Just because you feel this way doesn’t mean you are on the wrong path or that you failed. It may be a time to pivot.
“I can't change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination.”
YOU ARE ONE DECISION AWAY
Think about it, if we knew every step ahead of us (pain, joy, rejection, loss, etc.) we would not want to move forward most of the time. However, every decision you make by faith will move you towards something you are seeking. One decision is all you need to make a pivot, experience success, meet your partner, and so on. The good news… even if that one decision doesn’t work out for you, that is okay because you now know what doesn’t work. It is a win-win.
Every decision has lessons, adds value, and provides opportunities. Moving in the direction of what you want doesn’t guarantee you will get it, but it moves the chances of it happening in your favor.
Sydney Poitier said, “Along the way, I have accumulated no words of wisdom; and have, therefore, arrived with no message of importance. But I will leave you with a simple observation: The rewards were in the journey and there were many.”
YOU ARE BUMMED….NOW WHAT?
1. Allow yourself to grieve the loss of the life you wanted or the things that did not happen.
2. Avoid idealizing other people’s lives and stop comparing yourself to others.
3. Cherish the good that has come into your life.
4. Don’t stop believing in yourself and in your future.
THIS I KNOW…. life as we know it, planned or unplanned, is wonderful, but it has no guarantee of constant happiness. Remember, those who you think get everything they want are not immune to disappointment and regret. What an unexpected life lacks in predictability or ease, it can make up for in possibility, including the possibility that against all odds, in ways we never could have foreseen, it ends up being the life we wanted. You are the one who makes your life meaningful and purposeful. So when your life doesn’t appear to be going as planned, change the narrative, change your perspective, and keep reaching for your goals. Relax. You have not missed it. It’s not too late. Your ship has not sailed. Life will always be there waiting for you to step into it. Do you dare to believe again?
Jeremiah 29:11: “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”
